There is POWER in Writing Down Your Wildest Dreams!

December 25, 2020 makes the SEVENTH Christmas I have spent without my mom... It's about 8:50pm and I have survived the entire day without a tear falling... well that was true until about 8:15pm. I sat in my room that was her room before she passed and thought about what I always wanted to do for her once I "made it"! Often these thoughts come to me and I am always immediately sadden and bought to tears at just the thought. One thing that remained the same is I am sitting here crying thinking about her, but it is not so much about the gifts. It is about what I know is coming. The tears are usually coming from a place of anger and heartbreak. Today things are different. These tears are coming from a place of re-memory and strength. The dreams I had as a little girl popped up in my mind and I sat here wanting to relive every moment I've ever had with her. Take this journey with me... Please...

The BEST gifts my mother ever gave me were those where she wrote me letters and made my wildest dreams come true. Like the one year I told her I would grow older and buy her a mansion! I remember sitting there for at least 45 minutes talking about the number of bedrooms, bathrooms, a gigantic kitchen and a backyard big enough for her to host summer BBQ's and kickbacks. I told her I would make sure I got a car so I could drive her around and she wouldn't have to ask/ pay for cabs or rides from other people. I told her we would have enough money to help all the people she wanted to help in the whole wide world. I was 10, and she told me to write them all down. She pulled out a black journal and told me to use it to hold all my wildest dreams. I did... I wrote until I couldn't anymore. I made a declaration that I would do it all for her. I just wanted her to smile and never stop. I wanted to continue to warm her heart, and that was my focus to keep going.

It's amazing how 20 years later on the same day, just a different year I have the same dream. To make her proud and to make her smile. I wanted her to be pleased with me and to always know that I had her, just like she always had me. I sit at my computer remembering the same strength I possessed at 10. The same zeal and desire to make her name great! On this Christmas I remember everything I wrote in the black book... Although I do not have it physically, it is edged in my heart and my mind forever. I will continue to live out the dream I wrote about 20 years ago.

So why share this with you on Christmas?

1. There is power in memory and re-memory.

2. Writing your wildest dreams down is power and declaration.

3. Legacy doesn't stop when someone dies, it must continue even if it takes 20 years or more.

4. Crying is strength and should be treated with reverence.

5. ALWAYS be kind to yourself.

6. Last, allow yourself to go to the places that made you feel safe and loved

Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays!